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All posts tagged "ψείρες"

FUNNY7 μήνες ago

Ανέκδοτο: Είναι δυο ψείρες σε ένα beach bar στην Χαλκιδική. Φοβερό γέλιο

Hταν δυο ψείρες σε μια παραλία της Χαλκιδικής. Λέει η μια στην άλλη. Που κρύωσες έτσι και έχεις γίνει χάλια; -Άστα λέει αυτή, ανέβηκα πάνω στα...
FUNNY1 έτος ago

ΑΝΕΚΔΟΤΟ: Είναι ο Κωστίκας, μια ΨΕΙΡΑ και η Π@@ΤΣΑ κάγκελο! Τρελό γέλιο

Ήταν ο Κωστίκας ένα πρωί στο κρεβάτι και μόλις ξυπνάει το πρωί βλέπει το εργαλείο του κάγκελο. Περιμένει κανένα τέταρτο, τίποτα αυτή, παρέμενε κάγκελο. Τι να...

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rgba(0,0,0,.2);position:absolute;top:50px;left:0;max-width:200px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;text-align:left;-webkit-transition:opacity .2s;-moz-transition:opacity .2s;-ms-transition:opacity .2s;-o-transition:opacity .2s;transition:opacity .2s;-webkit-transform:translateY(-999px);-moz-transform:translateY(-999px);-ms-transform:translateY(-999px);-o-transform:translateY(-999px);transform:translateY(-999px);width:auto;height:0;z-index:1}.mvp-nav-menu ul li:hover ul.sub-menu{opacity:1;overflow:visible;-webkit-transform:translateY(0);-moz-transform:translateY(0);-ms-transform:translateY(0);-o-transform:translateY(0);transform:translateY(0);height:auto}.mvp-nav-menu ul li ul.sub-menu li{display:block;float:left;position:relative;width:100%}.mvp-nav-menu ul li ul.sub-menu li a{background:#fff;border-top:1px solid rgba(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom:none;color:#000!important;float:left;font-size:13px;font-weight:500;line-height:1.1;padding:12px 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3px;content:'';position:absolute;top:14px;right:10px}#mvp-fly-wrap{overflow:hidden;position:fixed;top:0;bottom:0;left:0;-webkit-transform:translate3d(-370px,0,0);-moz-transform:translate3d(-370px,0,0);-ms-transform:translate3d(-370px,0,0);-o-transform:translate3d(-370px,0,0);transform:translate3d(-370px,0,0);width:370px;height:100%;z-index:999999}.mvp-fly-but-wrap,.mvp-search-but-wrap{cursor:pointer;width:30px}.mvp-fly-but-wrap{height:20px}#mvp-fly-wrap .mvp-fly-but-wrap{margin:15px 0}.mvp-nav-top-left .mvp-fly-but-wrap{display:none;margin-top:-10px;opacity:0;position:absolute;top:50%;left:0;height:20px}.mvp-nav-bot-left{margin:15px 0;height:20px}.mvp-search-but-wrap{position:absolute;top:60px;right:80px;width:60px;height:60px}.mvp-fly-but-wrap span,.mvp-search-but-wrap span{-webkit-border-radius:2px;-moz-border-radius:2px;-ms-border-radius:2px;-o-border-radius:2px;border-radius:2px;display:block;position:absolute;left:0;-webkit-transform:rotate(0deg);-moz-transform:rotate(0deg);-ms-transform:rotate(0deg);-o-transform:rotate(0deg);transform:rotate(0deg);-webkit-transition:.25s ease-in-out;-moz-transition:.25s ease-in-out;-ms-transition:.25s ease-in-out;-o-transition:.25s ease-in-out;transition:.25s ease-in-out;height:3px}.mvp-nav-top-left .mvp-fly-but-wrap{opacity:1}.mvp-fly-but-wrap span:nth-child(1){top:0;width:30px}.mvp-fly-but-wrap span:nth-child(2),.mvp-fly-but-wrap span:nth-child(3){top:8px;width:24px}.mvp-fly-but-wrap span:nth-child(4){top:16px;width:18px}.mvp-fly-but-wrap.mvp-fly-open span:nth-child(1),.mvp-fly-but-wrap.mvp-fly-open span:nth-child(4){top:.5px;left:50%;width:0%}.mvp-fly-but-wrap.mvp-fly-open span:nth-child(2),.mvp-search-but-wrap span:nth-child(1){-webkit-transform:rotate(45deg);-moz-transform:rotate(45deg);-ms-transform:rotate(45deg);-o-transform:rotate(45deg);transform:rotate(45deg);width:30px}.mvp-fly-but-wrap.mvp-fly-open span:nth-child(3),.mvp-search-but-wrap span:nth-child(2){-webkit-transform:rotate(-45deg);-moz-transform:rotate(-45deg);-ms-transform:rotate(-45deg);-o-transform:rotate(-45deg);transform:rotate(-45deg);width:30px}.mvp-search-but-wrap span:nth-child(1),.mvp-search-but-wrap span:nth-child(2){width:60px}#mvp-fly-menu-top{width:100%;height:50px}.mvp-fly-top-out{margin-right:-100px;left:50px;width:100%}.mvp-fly-top-in{margin-right:100px}#mvp-fly-logo{margin:10px 6.25%;text-align:center;width:87.5%;height:30px}#mvp-fly-logo img{line-height:0;height:100%}.mvp-fly-but-menu{float:left;margin-left:15px;position:relative}.mvp-fly-top{background:rgba(0,0,0,.3);border-top:1px solid #fff;border-left:1px solid #fff;border-bottom:1px solid #fff;color:#fff;cursor:pointer;opacity:1;overflow:hidden;position:fixed;right:0;top:50%;-webkit-transition:all .3s;transition:all .3s;-webkit-transform:translate3d(100px,0,0);-moz-transform:translate3d(100px,0,0);-ms-transform:translate3d(100px,0,0);-o-transform:translate3d(100px,0,0);transform:translate3d(100px,0,0);width:50px;height:50px;z-index:9999}.mvp-fly-top:hover{color:#000}.mvp-fly-top i{font-size:40px;line-height:100%;position:absolute;top:1px;left:12.1px}#mvp-fly-menu-wrap{overflow:hidden;position:absolute;top:50px;left:0;width:100%;height:100%}nav.mvp-fly-nav-menu{-webkit-backface-visibility:hidden;backface-visibility:hidden;margin:20px 5.40540540541% 0;overflow:hidden;position:absolute!important;width:89.1891891892%;max-height:65%}nav.mvp-fly-nav-menu ul{float:left;position:relative;width:100%}nav.mvp-fly-nav-menu ul li{border-top:1px solid rgba(255,255,255,.1);cursor:pointer;float:left;position:relative;width:100%;-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0)}nav.mvp-fly-nav-menu ul li:first-child{border-top:none;margin-top:-14px}nav.mvp-fly-nav-menu ul li ul li:first-child{margin-top:0}nav.mvp-fly-nav-menu ul li a{color:#fff;display:inline-block;float:left;font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:1;padding:14px 0;text-transform:uppercase}nav.mvp-fly-nav-menu ul li.menu-item-has-children:after{content:'+';font-family:'Open Sans',sans-serif;font-size:32px;font-weight:700;position:absolute;right:0;top:7px}nav.mvp-fly-nav-menu ul li ul.sub-menu{border-top:1px solid rgba(255,255,255,.1);display:none;float:left;padding-left:6.66666666666%;width:93.333333333%}.mvp-fly-fade{background:#000;cursor:pointer;opacity:0;width:100%;position:fixed;top:0;left:0;z-index:99999}#mvp-fly-soc-wrap{margin:0 5.40540540541%;position:absolute;bottom:20px;left:0;text-align:center;width:89.1891891892%}span.mvp-fly-soc-head{display:inline-block;font-size:.7rem;font-weight:400;line-height:1;margin-bottom:15px;text-transform:uppercase}ul.mvp-fly-soc-list{text-align:center;width:100%}ul.mvp-fly-soc-list li{display:inline-block}ul.mvp-fly-soc-list li a{background:rgba(255,255,255,.15);-webkit-border-radius:50%;-moz-border-radius:50%;-ms-border-radius:50%;-o-border-radius:50%;border-radius:50%;color:#fff;display:inline-block;font-size:14px;line-height:1;margin-left:2px;padding-top:9px;text-align:center;width:32px;height:23px}ul.mvp-fly-soc-list li:first-child a{margin-left:0}ul.mvp-fly-soc-list li a:hover{font-size:16px;padding-top:8px;height:24px}#mvp-feat1-wrap{background:#fff;margin-bottom:60px;width:100%}.mvp-cat-date-wrap{margin-bottom:7px;width:100%}span.mvp-cd-cat,span.mvp-cd-date{color:#777;display:inline-block;float:left;font-size:.7rem;line-height:1}span.mvp-cd-cat{font-weight:700;text-transform:uppercase}span.mvp-cd-date{font-weight:400;margin-left:5px}span.mvp-cd-date:before{content:"/";margin-right:5px}#mvp-feat2-wrap{width:100%}#mvp-feat2-wrap{margin-bottom:60px}#mvp-feat3-wrap{margin-bottom:60px;width:100%}#mvp-feat4-wrap{background:#000;margin-bottom:100px;max-height:432px;width:100%}#mvp-feat5-wrap{margin:0 0 60px;width:100%}#mvp-feat6-wrap{background:#000;margin:0 0 60px;overflow:hidden;width:100%}#mvp-feat6-main{width:100%}#mvp-feat6-img{line-height:0;width:66.666666%}#mvp-feat6-img:after{content:'';background-image:-moz-linear-gradient(to left,rgba(0,0,0,0) 0,rgba(0,0,0,.5) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);background-image:-ms-linear-gradient(to left,rgba(0,0,0,0) 0,rgba(0,0,0,.5) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);background-image:-o-linear-gradient(to left,rgba(0,0,0,0) 0,rgba(0,0,0,.5) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);background-image:-webkit-linear-gradient(to left,rgba(0,0,0,0) 0,rgba(0,0,0,.5) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);background-image:-webkit-gradient(linear,middle right,middle left,from(rgba(0,0,0,0)),to(rgba(0,0,0,1)));background-image:linear-gradient(to left,rgba(0,0,0,0) 0,rgba(0,0,0,.5) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);position:absolute;left:0;top:0;width:50%;height:100%}#mvp-feat6-main:hover #mvp-feat6-img img{opacity:.8}#mvp-feat6-text{position:absolute;left:50px;top:50px;width:45%}#mvp-feat6-text h2{color:#fff;float:left;font-size:3.5rem;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:-.02em;line-height:1;width:100%}#mvp-feat6-text p{color:#fff;float:left;font-size:1.15rem;font-weight:300;line-height:1.4;margin-top:20px;width:100%}#mvp-main-body-wrap{background:#fff;padding-bottom:60px;width:100%}#mvp-home-widget-wrap{width:100%}#mvp-home-widget-wrap{margin-bottom:60px}.mvp-widget-home-head{float:left;position:relative;width:100%}h4.mvp-widget-home-title{float:left;margin-bottom:20px;position:relative;text-align:center;width:100%}h4.mvp-widget-home-title:before{content:'';background:#555;display:inline-block;position:absolute;left:0;bottom:50%;width:100%;height:1px;z-index:0}span.mvp-widget-home-title{color:#fff;display:inline-block;font-size:1.1rem;font-weight:700;line-height:1;padding:5px 13px;position:relative;text-transform:uppercase;transform:skewX(-15deg);z-index:1}.mvp-main-blog-wrap,.mvp-main-blog-cont,.mvp-main-blog-body,ul.mvp-blog-story-list{width:100%}.mvp-main-blog-out{margin-right:-380px;width:100%}.mvp-main-blog-in{margin-right:380px}.mvp-blog-story-wrap{border-top:1px solid #ddd;margin-top:20px;width:100%}ul.mvp-blog-story-list .mvp-blog-story-wrap:first-child{margin-top:10px}.archive ul.mvp-blog-story-list .mvp-blog-story-wrap:first-child{margin-top:0}.mvp-blog-story-out{float:right;margin-left:-410px;width:100%}.mvp-blog-story-in{margin-left:410px}.mvp-blog-story-img{background:#000;line-height:0;margin-right:30px;overflow:hidden;width:380px}.mvp-blog-story-wrap:hover .mvp-blog-story-img img{opacity:.8}.mvp-blog-story-text{margin-top:30px;width:100%}.mvp-blog-story-text h2{color:#222;float:left;font-size:1.7rem;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:-.02em;line-height:1.1;width:100%}.mvp-blog-story-wrap:hover .mvp-blog-story-text h2{opacity:.6}.mvp-blog-story-text p{color:#555;float:left;font-size:1.1rem;font-weight:300;line-height:1.4;margin-top:10px;width:100%}#mvp-side-wrap{font-size:.9rem;margin-left:60px;width:320px}.mvp-side-widget{float:left;margin-top:30px;width:100%}.mvp-side-widget:first-child{margin-top:0}#mvp-home-widget-wrap a:first-child .mvp-flex-col,#mvp-home-widget-wrap a:nth-child(2n+3) .mvp-flex-col{margin-left:0}#mvp-home-widget-wrap a:first-child .mvp-flex-col-noad,#mvp-home-widget-wrap a:nth-child(3n+4) .mvp-flex-col-noad{margin-left:0!important}#wp-calendar{width:100%}#wp-calendar caption{text-align:right;color:#333;font-size:12px;margin-bottom:15px}#wp-calendar thead{font-size:10px}#wp-calendar thead th{padding-bottom:10px}#wp-calendar tbody{color:#aaa}#wp-calendar tbody td{background:#f5f5f5;border:1px solid #fff;text-align:center;padding:8px}#wp-calendar tbody td:hover{background:#fff}#wp-calendar tfoot #next{font-size:10px;text-transform:uppercase;text-align:right}#wp-calendar tfoot #prev{font-size:10px;text-transform:uppercase;padding-top:10px}#mvp-side-wrap #searchform input,#mvp-home-widget-wrap #searchform input{background:#fff;border:1px solid #ddd;-webkit-border-radius:3px;-moz-border-radius:3px;-ms-border-radius:3px;-o-border-radius:3px;border-radius:3px;color:#999;font-size:16px;padding:5px 5%;height:16px;width:88%}#mvp-article-wrap,#mvp-article-cont{width:100%}#mvp-article-wrap{float:left;position:relative}#mvp-post-main{margin:10px 0 60px;width:100%}#mvp-post-head{margin-bottom:30px;width:100%}.archive #mvp-post-head{margin-top:10px}h1.mvp-post-title{color:#000;font-family:'Oswald',sans-serif;font-size:3.5rem;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:-.02em;line-height:1.1;margin-right:20%;width:80%}#mvp-post-content h1.mvp-post-title{font-size:2.9rem;margin-right:0;width:100%}.archive h1.mvp-post-title{font-size:2.5rem;margin-right:0;text-align:center;width:100%}#mvp-post-content{font-family:'Roboto',sans-serif;width:100%}#mvp-post-feat-img{line-height:0;margin-bottom:30px;text-align:center;width:100%}#mvp-post-feat-img-wide{background:#000;margin-bottom:30px;overflow:hidden;width:100%;max-height:720px}#mvp-post-feat-img-wide #mvp-post-feat-img{margin-bottom:0}#mvp-post-feat-img-wide #mvp-post-feat-img img{opacity:.4;width:100%}#mvp-post-feat-text-wrap{position:absolute;left:0;bottom:30%;width:100%}#mvp-video-embed-wrap{margin-bottom:30px;width:100%}#mvp-video-embed-cont{width:100%}#mvp-video-embed{overflow:hidden;padding-bottom:56.25%;position:relative;text-align:center;width:100%;height:0}#mvp-video-embed-wrap{margin-bottom:30px;width:100%}#mvp-video-embed iframe,#mvp-video-embed object,#mvp-video-embed embed{position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%}#mvp-vid-wide-wrap{background:#000;margin-bottom:30px;width:100%}#mvp-content-wrap,#mvp-content-body,#mvp-content-main,#mvp-content-body-top{width:100%}#mvp-content-main{line-height:1.55}#mvp-content-main p{color:#000;display:block;font-family:'Roboto',sans-serif;font-size:1.1rem;font-weight:400;line-height:1.55;margin-bottom:20px}#mvp-content-main p a{color:#000}#mvp-content-bot{width:100%}#mvp-author-box-wrap{margin-top:30px;width:100%}#mvp-author-box-img{line-height:0;margin-right:20px;width:60px}#mvp-author-box-img img{border:2px solid #ddd;border-radius:50%}#mvp-author-box-head,#mvp-author-box-text{width:100%}#mvp-author-box-text{margin-top:8px}#mvp-author-box-text p{color:#777;float:left;font-size:.9rem;font-weight:400;line-height:1.5;margin-bottom:0;width:100%}#mvp-author-box-soc-wrap{margin-top:10px;width:100%}#mvp-drop-nav-wrap{margin-left:1.6666666%;width:65%}#mvp-prev-next-wrap{border-bottom:1px solid #ddd;margin-top:30px;padding-bottom:30px;width:100%}#mvp-post-bot-ad{line-height:0;margin-top:30px;text-align:center;width:100%}#mvp-related-posts{margin-top:30px;width:100%}ul.mvp-related-posts-list a:first-child li,ul.mvp-related-posts-list a:nth-child(3n+4) li{margin-left:0}#mvp-post-add-wrap{margin-top:60px;width:100%}#mvp-post-more-wrap{width:100%}ul.mvp-post-more-list a:first-child li,ul.mvp-post-more-list a:nth-child(4n+5) li{margin-left:0}#mvp-soc-mob-wrap{background:#fff;-webkit-box-shadow:0 0 16px 0 rgba(0,0,0,.2);-moz-box-shadow:0 0 16px 0 rgba(0,0,0,.2);-ms-box-shadow:0 0 16px 0 rgba(0,0,0,.2);-o-box-shadow:0 0 16px 0 rgba(0,0,0,.2);box-shadow:0 0 16px 0 rgba(0,0,0,.2);display:none;position:fixed;left:0;bottom:0;-webkit-transform:translate3d(0,70px,0);-moz-transform:translate3d(0,70px,0);-ms-transform:translate3d(0,70px,0);-o-transform:translate3d(0,70px,0);transform:translate3d(0,70px,0);-webkit-transition:-webkit-transform 0.5s ease;-moz-transition:-moz-transform 0.5s ease;-ms-transition:-ms-transform 0.5s ease;-o-transition:-o-transform 0.5s ease;transition:transform 0.5s ease;width:100%;height:40px;z-index:9999}#mvp-content-main ul{list-style:disc outside;margin:10px 0}#mvp-content-main ol{list-style:decimal outside;margin:10px 0}#mvp-content-main ul li,#mvp-content-main ol li{margin-left:50px;padding:5px 0}#mvp-content-main h1,#mvp-content-main h2,#mvp-content-main h3,#mvp-content-main h4,#mvp-content-main h5,#mvp-content-main h6{font-family:'Oswald',sans-serif;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:-.02em;line-height:1.4;margin:10px 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.mvp-fly-but-wrap{display:inline}.mvp-main-box{margin:0 3.3333333333%;width:93.3333333333%}#mvp-feat1-wrap{margin-bottom:40px}#mvp-main-nav-top{padding:10px 0!important;height:30px!important;z-index:9999}.mvp-nav-top-mid{height:30px!important}.mvp-nav-top-mid img{height:100%!important}#mvp-main-nav-bot{border-bottom:none;display:none!important;height:0}.mvp-nav-top-mid img{margin-left:0}.mvp-nav-top-left-out{margin-left:-50px}.mvp-nav-top-left-in{margin-left:50px}.mvp-nav-top-left{display:block}.mvp-nav-top-right-out{margin-right:-50px}.mvp-nav-top-right-in{margin-right:50px}.mvp-nav-top-right{width:50px}.mvp-nav-top-right .mvp-nav-search-but{display:block}#mvp-side-wrap{border-top:1px solid #ddd;margin:20px 0 0;padding-top:20px;width:100%}.mvp-widget-feat1-cont a:nth-child(2n+3) .mvp-widget-feat1-bot-story,.mvp-feat2-bot a:nth-child(2n+3) .mvp-feat2-bot-story{margin-left:0}#mvp-feat2-wrap{margin:-20px 0 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0,rgba(0,0,0,.5) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);background-image:-webkit-gradient(linear,center top,center bottom,from(rgba(0,0,0,0)),to(rgba(0,0,0,1)));background-image:linear-gradient(to bottom,rgba(0,0,0,0) 0,rgba(0,0,0,.5) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);top:auto;bottom:0;width:100%;height:50%}#mvp-feat6-text{float:left;margin-top:-70px;padding:0 4.16666666% 20px;position:relative;top:auto;left:auto;width:91.66666666%}#mvp-feat6-text h2{font-size:2.2rem}#mvp-feat6-text p{font-size:1rem;margin-top:15px}}@media screen and (max-width:479px){#mvp-wallpaper,.mvp-nav-soc-wrap,.mvp-fly-top,.mvp-reg-img,.mvp-blog-story-text p,#mvp-woo-side-wrap,.mvp-nav-logo-reg,#mvp-nav-small-wrap .mvp-nav-menu,#mvp-feat6-text p{display:none!important}#mvp-soc-mob-wrap,.mvp-nav-logo-small,.mvp-nav-top-left .mvp-fly-but-wrap{display:inline}.mvp-mob-img{display:block!important}.mvp-main-box{margin:0 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#mvp-video-embed-wrap{margin-left:-4.5454545454%;width:109.0909090909%}#mvp-content-main p{font-size:1rem}ul.mvp-related-posts-list a:nth-child(3n+4) li,ul.mvp-related-posts-list a:nth-child(2n+3) li,ul.mvp-post-more-list a:nth-child(4n+5) li{margin-left:0}#mvp-comments-button a{padding:10px 0}#mvp-post-add-wrap{margin-top:30px}#mvp-post-feat-img,#mvp-video-embed-wrap{margin-bottom:20px}.mvp-cat-date-wrap{margin-bottom:4px}#mvp-author-box-wrap,#mvp-post-bot-ad,#mvp-related-posts{margin-top:20px}#mvp-prev-next-wrap{margin-top:20px;padding-bottom:20px}#mvp-content-wrap{float:left;margin:0}#mvp-post-feat-img-wide{margin-bottom:15px}#mvp-post-feat-text-wrap{left:15px;bottom:15px}.archive h1.mvp-post-title{font-size:1.3rem}#mvp-author-page-top{margin-bottom:10px;padding:15px 0;width:100%}#mvp-author-top-left{margin:0 0 15px 0;text-align:center;width:100%}#mvp-author-top-right{text-align:center}#mvp-author-top-left img{border:5px solid #ddd;width:120px}.mvp-authors-list-wrap:nth-child(4n+4),.mvp-authors-list-wrap:nth-child(3n+3){margin-left:0}#mvp-404{margin:100px 0}#mvp-404 h1{font-size:4rem}.mvp-nav-top-mid a{left:0}#mvp-main-body-wrap{padding-top:15px}#mvp-feat3-wrap{margin:-15px 0 30px}#mvp-feat4-wrap{margin:-15px 0 30px;max-height:none}#mvp-home-widget-wrap{margin-bottom:30px}#mvp-feat5-wrap{margin:0 0 30px}#mvp-home-widget-wrap .mvp-flex-col-noad,#mvp-home-widget-wrap a:nth-child(2n+3) .mvp-flex-col-noad,#mvp-home-widget-wrap a:nth-child(3n+4) .mvp-flex-col-noad{margin:0 0 15px!important}#mvp-content-body-top{overflow:hidden}#mvp-feat6-wrap{margin:-15px 0 30px -4.54545454%;width:109.09090909%}#mvp-feat6-img{width:100%}#mvp-feat6-img:after{background-image:-moz-linear-gradient(to bottom,rgba(0,0,0,0) 0,rgba(0,0,0,.5) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);background-image:-ms-linear-gradient(to bottom,rgba(0,0,0,0) 0,rgba(0,0,0,.5) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);background-image:-o-linear-gradient(to bottom,rgba(0,0,0,0) 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